Pay It Forward

  

Kathi was the most no-holds-barred, tell-it-like-it-is, supportive, grounded friend and supervisor I've ever had.

That first day, she started me off with a simple assignment. She had pulled old files from their active filing cabinet and put them into a box. My assignment was to write down all the files, alphabetize them, and print her out a list so she could put a description on the outside of the box.

She didn't have room for me to sit at her desk with her, but there was an open desk in the Adoption Center, so she set me up there, making sure I had a username, password, and a working computer. Believe it or not, the computer part took almost half a day, as there was only one computer guy assigned to the shelter and he was busy with other folks. ; )

In the meantime, I had someplace to park my rear and so I meticulously combed through the box, making sure I missed nothing. When I was done, as I had been trained to do in the accounting field, I went back and checked again, finding a few things I had missed. So much better for me to find my mistakes than for someone else!

The next day, the computer was up and running, so I was able to bang out my list pretty quickly. When I brought it to her, she said, "Wow, you're fast! Lemme just doublecheck some of your entries..." Kathi then proceeded to check every single item on the list. That was just her years of accounting background kicking in; doublecheck, then triplecheck *everything*. I settled in to my new digs while she was busy. After about a half hour, she turned to me and said, incredulously, "You didn't miss anything."

"Yeah, okay," I stammered, not really sure what the proper etiquette was here, and continued, "....so what do we do next?" (Where's Billy Talley when you need him?!)

Now she turned to me - and looked at me - really looked at me. "Lou said I was getting you cheap. Now what is it you did before?"

So I gave her a brief synopsis of my work history, ending with the fact that I desperately needed a job so I had taken far less than I was accustomed to.

Some of the confusion on her face cleared up. "Oh, so you're a word processor. *That's* why you were so fast! I was a little concerned at your speed." Then she laughed, "It also seemed strange to me that you weren't at all taken aback by me checking you. With the accounting in your background, you're accustomed to it, aren't you? You probably checked over it before you gave it to me, right?"

I nodded, "Yes, ma'am. Three times. Caught stuff every time." I smiled back at her and said, "But I might have missed something."

"Great! I appreciate that. I'm doing so much, going so fast that I appreciate the fact that you've done some of the legwork for me. I hope you understand that I *have* to check. It's just the nature of the beast." I did understand and I told her so.

She gave me another one of those long looks and said, "I think you're the best temp I've ever had. I'm gonna have to pimp you out!"

Wow - again, I wasn't sure what to say, so I just smiled awkwardly, looked away, blushed, and said, "Good deal."

And that was Kathi - sharp, on it, always making sure she had good information before she made any decisions. All delivered with a sly glance, a glimmer of humor in her eye, and with a wry sense of humor. It was a good life lesson.

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Simple assignments gave way to more complex ones, as she tested my skills and we got to know each other. I never assumed to know; I always had questions. In my experience, asking questions *before* you did the project was much better than finding out you did it wrong and having to do it over again, this time the right way. (That was a lesson I had found out early in my career.)

We began to become friends, sharing current and past history. Kathi really seemed to take an interest in me; I was flattered. I think that the way my year had gone was trampling me down, softly killing my spirit. I began to expect the next kick that life was going to deal me. I had begun to feel like I had fallen into a rabbit hole that was just neverending. I was in a no-man's land; everything I had known about myself I was questioning. It was a scary place for me, mentally. Financially, too - for sure. But it was the mental part I think that had worn me down. If I didn't really have *mad skills*, then what had I been doing for 15 years? It was a maddening set of questions that rattled around in my brain like pebbles in an empty bottle.

A painfully shy introvert, I was normally so politely reserved that people had difficulty reading me. Last year's experience changed that; I was being yanked out of my shell - driven by the need to express the anger, sadness, and daily disappointments that had become my life.

Kathi reminded me, in no uncertain terms, that I was a good worker, that I did have skills, that I was fast and accurate, and that I was quickly becoming a right hand to her. I think that she could see how much I was hurting inside, how the questions roiled inside my brain, and even, I think, to see my desperation. She pressed me for details; offered suggestions; and generally, was a shoulder to cry on.

Before I knew it, October was over, and Thanksgiving was quickly gaining on me. Trying to keep up with $300 power bills, groceries, gas for my exceedingly comfortable, but wretchedly gas-guzzling SUV, was killing me, financially. All I can say is *thank God* I got paid weekly at the temporary agency. When I paid all I could, at least I only had to be broke for another 6 days. (wry LOL)

I was rapidly going through my stash of canned goods and frozen veges/meats from Sams Club. I started to worry that not only would I *not* be able to provide Mom and I a comfortable Thanksgiving dinner - I might not be able to keep us in food the rest of the month. I worried; I had Excel spreadsheets full of "what-if" calculations that I regularly updated between tasks.

The week before Thanksgiving, Kathi asked me what I was doing for the holiday. All the stress, worry, anger, and frustration pushed through my wall of introvert and I broke down in tears. I laid it all on the line, snuffling loudly and trying desperately to hide my flame-red eyes and streaked mascara, knowing all too well that tomorrow they would be swollen and puffy all day long.

Kathi suggested a food bank; I shared my story of the peanut butter, packets of oatmeal, and canned vegetable and meat. She was floored; indeed, she started to get mad *for me*! "Well, what the hell?!" I told her I had applied for food stamps and been denied (my mother made too much retirement income). I told her I had applied for electric bill assistance with the same result - between my mother's and my (lack of) income, we made too much to qualify for any assistance. It was a sad state, but I had left no stone unturned. The best thing I had found was a series of coupon websites - SavingsStar, Coupons, and Ziplist, just to name a few. There I could find coupons and/or deals, pick which grocery store I would be going to, and *sometimes* double the coupon.

Two days before Thanksgiving, Kathi presented me with a personalized card with an "owl turkey" she had hand drawn for me. (Kathi was an accomplished photographer and artist in her spare time and ran a website selling said goodies.) Inside her beautiful card was $50 cash and a Visa gift card preloaded with $50. Again, the tears came, but this time it was with immense gratitude. She told me that she had told a few people (and saw the look of horror that came over my face) and that this was the result of those few people wanting Mom and I to be able to enjoy our Thanksgiving. Not entirely sure what to say, I just said thank you – *a bunch* – and asked her how I could ever repay her kindness. Her response? “Just pay it forward.”

I went to Winn Dixie (where I could use the most coupons) and came out with a bounty of food, not just for Thanksgiving. Indeed, I was so overwhelmed that I laid all of it out on top of my freezer, took pictures, and posted to Facebook, with a post thanking Kathi and all the people at the shelter who had contributed. All that is pictured here came to $92, which left me a few dollars for gas. 

The following day, Kathi came in and told me she had a gift for me, but that she wanted to wait until after work to give it to me. I told her no, she had been too gracious, I couldn't possibly accept anything else from her. She brushed me aside and said not to make a big deal of it, but that I would enjoy it.

After work, she pulled out two full grocery totes of canned goods - goods she had culled from her own pantry - to help ease my worry. Even as I write this I am crying. What a wonderful human being! Words alone cannot express how blessed I am to have found such a person....

______________

True to her word, Kathi did, indeed, pimp me out.

As I caught her up on all her invoices, I began assisting the front desk in entering backdated tag information, as well as assisting the vets in entering medical records into the proprietary software the shelter used.

When I had time, I also assisted Susan in the Adoption Center, occasionally running background information on potential adopters but mostly providing people with general information as they wandered around the shelter.

My work with Kathi restored my faith in not only myself, but in all of humanity. Good people do exist.